There’s an incredible thing which happens when you FULLY unplug; no emails, texts, WhatsApp’s, telegrams, any + all social media (which means no pesky dm’s or notifications), no forever ‘suggested for you’ YouTube, or ‘what you’ve missed’ news. All things OFF. What are you left with? Just you.
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First, like a roll of finished film, there is a process of unwinding. All the gunk which we’ve acquired from the never-ending loop of information + notifications starts slowly flashing before your eyes. This conversation. That argument. This bit of news. That picture. Ohh all of those yet unanswered emails + texts. What were they about? My to-do list + all of its missing completed checks. Maybe I should re-plug otherwise I’ll never get rid of these things.
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Then a flinch of the hand + a persistant glance of the eyes to the screen like an annoying tick: what am I missing?! A sadness comes over the body: I miss my phone. Then a sobering realization: I miss my phone. Suddenly the loop of thoughts clear + the roll of film ejected.
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Clarity. Hello, brain. This is you? There’s so much room! A settling feeling washes over you. Then waves begin breaking. That breakup from 10 years ago. This death from a few weeks ago. That time my ‘friend’ in 5th grade made me feel small. This relationship ‘break’ that I’m going through. But I said I’d be there 5 years ago, not here. Phone! Phone! Phone! Breathe it through. Ride the wave. I do. Memories; traumatic + pleasant surface, then easily wash away. Just watch. Observe. Learn. I do.
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Stillness. Like a music engineer standing above a board; knobs, buttons, sounds, all available to use in order to build a new tune. I’d like this. Then that. Not too long. Softer. Gently increasing at this important crescendo. Oh, sweet music. This is the song of my life I am creating in my cocoon.
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Upon return to the digital world there is a confidence, a calm, a warm, glowing cool. Capable, dependable, fluid, wealthy, sturdy, full, made entirely of my own notes, beats + instruments, I return to dance to my own tune. Now the real work begins: to remain in my song + to sing my FULL Truth.